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Be their inner voice

someone told me once that your inner voice is created by those around you in early childhood.
this means that how you speak to your child is how they will speak to themselves subconsciously.
I know this to be true.
think about how you speak to your child, Do you treat them like a burden? do you get irritated when they ask for ANOTHER snack? Do you listen to their stories while tapping your foot impatiently? Do you interrupt them?
Think of the last conversation you had with your kiddo. Do you remember what they were telling you? did you look up from your phone? Did they get to finish, or did you get annoyed half way through and say something like "ok, but what are you supposed to be doing right now?"
Im not judging. I am guilty of these things sometimes too. But today I am making a promise to try harder to be the inner voice I want them to have.

I want my boys to grow up feeling
 secure
loved
wanted
needed
assured
heard
important
smart
validated

In order to do this I need to listen to my 5 year olds story about what happened in his video game.
I need to laugh at the jokes they find hilarious.
I need to hug them when they are in the midst of a tantrum, because little fellas just don't know how to regulate their own emotions. (that's part of raising a child)
I need to celebrate the time we have together before bed, and not seem so relieved as i tuck them in at night.
I need to fulfil their needs with out having an attitude about getting up for the 9th time in the past 30 minutes
I need to ask them how they feel and what they want.
I need to listen to their ideas and let them make mistakes.
I need to let them do things their way and help them fix it if they need me,
I need to listen to their feelings and assure them that i understand their frustrations.
I need to approach them in a loving manner instead of a dictation.
I need to treat my children like small people instead of babies

I need to put myself in their shoes and ask myself how i would want a mother to respond.

This will make well rounded, caring, loving, secure individuals.

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